Give Thanks First

“As evening approached, the disciples came to Him and said, ‘This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.’  Jesus replied, ‘They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.’  ‘We have only five loaves of bread and two fish,’ they answered.  ‘Bring them here to me,’ He said.  And He directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, He gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then He gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over.” -Matthew 14:15-20

I got to see a miracle the other day.  The thing is, it looked a lot like a birthday party.

On this past Sunday, Elijah and I were lucky enough to attend a belated birthday party for Leticia, our little friend recently adopted into the Detrow family.  She turned 8 in October, but was still in Uganda awaiting her family at that point.  After finally arriving in the States, Leticia went to a couple of parties and expressed sadness over never having her birthday celebrated.  Obviously, this needed to be rectified.

So, Monkey Joe’s it was.  You can imagine the chaos visiting that crazy place entails.  But here’s what I saw in the midst of the bouncing, sweaty, yelling, crying mayhem: Community.  I saw answered prayers.  I saw people showing up.  Girlfriend has been here just a month and already has A CREW.  And when the entire kid squad used sign language to sing “Happy Birthday” to her, you could have stuck a fork in me because this emotional Mama was done.

Yes, Leticia is the glitter queen.  And yes, Elijah is the smirky one with his arms crossed.

When you are an adoptive family in waiting, it gives you PLENTY of time to think.  To think about how this not-super-diverse, rural community will accept your African daughter.  To think about the many transitions these adopted children have endured at such a young age.  You worry about your baby feeling at home, loved, and embraced by their peers.  And the list goes on.  But what I saw on Sunday flew in the face of all those fears.  The surface level challenges (the ones WE tend to focus on) faded away.  Instead I saw a daughter, sister, child, friend being welcomed in with open arms.

We can allow doubts and “what ifs” to sabotage our ability to receive something great from God.  Our thinking becomes so clouded by negativity, we block any potential claim to the miraculous. My pastor preached about that this past weekend, using Jesus’ example from the passage above.  There was a BIG problem (no food + lots of hungry people) and his disciples were freaking out about it.  But Jesus saw this as an opportunity for a BIG faith moment.  Then He went a step further by giving thanks BEFORE the miracle even occurred.  In the past, I never scrutinized that portion of the story.  I just assumed JC was sending up a little prayer like, “God, help me do this thing” and then BOOM bread and fish abounded.  But really it was, “God, thank you for what you are going to do” and then BAM supernatural food multiplication.  

Do you see the difference between the two prayers?  It is “Help ME” versus “Thank YOU!”  Not that “Help Me” prayers are bad.  In fact I would say for many of us busy mommies, they are necessary!  But the focus changes when we say “Thank YOU.”  We’ve redirected the attention off of US (our daily concerns, fears, insecurities) and onto God’s security and provision.  And by saying “Thank You” prior to the miracle happening, well that is just a chance for us to strengthen our faith muscles.

Maybe now you understand why a bunch of kids learning sign language just to sing “Happy Birthday” for their new friend would bring me to tears.  Because it’s exactly the kind of “bread and fishes” miracle we’d been expectantly praying for on behalf of the Detrows.  And sometimes for a skeptic like me, seeing really is believing.  

So, thank you God.  Thank you in advance for our daughter.  Thank you for making her a “Gross,” before we even glimpse her face.  Thank you for the selflessness and sacrifice of her birth mother.  Thank you for our baby girl's health and protection while we're apart from one another.  Thank you for all the adoption, orphanage, agency, and government workers who will help our adoption be a success.  Thank you for giving her such a supportive, loving community full of friends and family.  Thank you that she already has the best Daddy and big brother in the entire world.  But most of all God, I want to thank you for your mighty work enabling our incomplete family to be whole one day.  This is the miracle I have to believe in.

Me and the Birthday Girl!

“Father to the fatherless, defender of widows—this is God, whose dwelling is holy.  God places the lonely in families; 

He sets the prisoners free and gives them joy.”-Psalm 68:5-6a