Not to be nosy, but.......

Confession: I got my nose pierced.  Since this isn’t breaking news to either the parents or the in laws, I figured I could announce it here with little fallout.  David has been pestering me to get it done for years now, so when my friend Marilea announced her intent to pierce-the deal was basically sealed (in their minds at least!).  Plus I hadn’t disappointed my parents for awhile, so the time was right (that’s a joke, Mom!).

Post Piercing with Marilea and me.  It sounds like it should be a MTV reality show.

I realize some people feel about nose piercing how I feel about Winnie-the-Pooh sweatshirts worn by anyone with double digits in their age.  It’s unnatural.  On this point, we will have to agree to disagree. However, I did want to dive a little deeper into my reasoning for finally getting it done.  Because husband-pleasing fashion statement aside, there is a more significant reason I chose to put a ring on it.  

Self Esteem.  Blah, even typing those words as a female is draining.  It is a struggle to have a healthy, confident self image as a woman in America.  We are constantly being reminded that we are not enough.  I was floored by the feedback I got regarding a similar topic on my Mother’s Day blog.  So many friends were in agreement about the impossible standards we face as women (granted, sometimes we impose them on ourselves).  Beauty is top of that list.  If we don’t fall into the narrow, cookie cutter version of what’s beautiful in our culture, we beat ourselves up for it.

My friend Meghan wrote a post about this awhile back (read it here).  She specifically addressed the responsibility mothers have to their daughters for setting a good example concerning healthy self image.  That message stuck in my mind for weeks.  I’m so used to seeing flaws in myself, it never struck me as wrong, sinful, or potentially detrimental to my daughter’s future confidence.  It just seemed NORMAL to not like my body (P.S. I KNOW I’m not alone here).  Can you see how messed up that is?

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”-Psalm 139:14.  This verse is probably familiar to many of you.  Here God, who is perfect, is claiming YOU are wonderfully made.  YOU are an intricate creation of God.  This should be confirmation enough that you are beautiful.  Not that you should use God’s words as an excuse to be slovenly or unhealthy (“Hey, I’m WONDERFULLY made-pass me another pizza!”), but you can be certain that your body was created with precision and care by Jesus.  

And that brings us to the nose.  My most hated body part.  I always thought my nose looked very handsome on both my Dad and brother, but big and out of place on me.  So when David started asking me about getting it pierced, my internal dialogue went something like this: “NOOOO way.  Not in a million years.  I am NOT going to be drawing more attention to that ugly thing!”  Then we decided to adopt a daughter.  Then I read Meg’s blog.  Something started shifting inside of me.  I watched how healthy and confident Elijah is in his interactions.  He isn’t worried about social/cultural expectations about who he should be.  Why?  He has parents who affirm him on a daily basis; He knows without a shadow of a doubt that he is accepted and loved.  Do I need to make the connection for you?  Your heavenly Father LOVES you, he created you.  He knows you intimately-both your weaknesses and strengths.  And He says YOU are beautiful.

So I decided to own my nose, by piercing it.  My husband likes it and I can breathe out of it, so I guess that’s good enough (Please note: I am not condoning putting a hole in whatever body part you most dislike!  That could potentially be costly, painful, weird or all of the above.  The symbolism and tangible reminder happened to work well for me in this case).  After the deed was done, my sweet friend Rachel told me I “had a good nose for piercing”.  A nose compliment?  I got a good laugh out of that.  But this little ring has reminded me-my value should NOT be stemming from the physical, the superficial.  I have a healthy(ish), whole body and a Lord and family who love me and think I’m beautiful.  I’d say my cup is overflowing.

Mothers, it is your duty to teach your daughters about healthy self image.  And the first step is to practice what you preach!!  If you are constantly berating your body, what do you think your daughter will grow up to do?  I want my daughter to like who she is--to feel secure in herself.  Therefore, I need to be modeling that behavior.  I’m not sure what her (or your) inner struggle will be to reach that place of confidence, but I know it is based on trust.  As our little girl learns to trust in our unconditional love, support, and acceptance, her self assurance will grow.  Let it be the same for us.  I pray for increased faith in God to manifest itself in our boldness and certainty.  These are not qualities resulting from a fleeting external beauty, but from the beauty and promise that comes from being a purposeful creation of a trustworthy Maker.